What does it mean when your cat rubs against, licks, and head butts you?

Despite common misconceptions that cats are aloof- cats are in fact very affectionate and love to receive affection. In most cases, cats consider you and potentially the other animals they live with, as a part of their social group (family) and miss you when you’re gone. Sometimes all a cat wants to do is sit next to you or be involved with you- but not be touched. But sometimes, they will lick, headbutt, and rub against you for pets!

Do you know when your cat wants pets or doesn’t want pets? Use the consent test as in the infographic below - or simply Pet-Pet-Pause.

If your cat leans in for more pets, grabs your hand with their paw, or pushes their body against you- they want more pets. If they turn their head away, don’t do anything, or even move away, then they don’t want pets and want to be left alone.

Check out WFA’s YouTube below for how to use the consent test with cats.

Cats are great communicators and use a variety of ways to express how they’re feelings such as:

their body posture
their fur such as piloerection (when their fur stands up)
their tail position
ear position
pupils- are they dilated or almond-shaped
eye contact
whiskers
scratching
how they’re standing
how they interact with you and the other animals they live with

Cats often use tactile (touch) communication to express social behaviours between us, other cats, and even other animals.

When your cat rubs up against you, licks you or headbutts you, these are all tactile communication of social behaviours that are a wonderful sign of their friendship and their acceptance of you as a part of their social group (family).

Allorubbing

Allorubbing: when a cat rubs up against you, other cats, or animals that they are bonded with, or objects such as furniture or walls

Allorubbing is a tactile and an olfactory communicator. Cats often use their cheeks, mouths, but sometimes also their body and tail to rub up against the person, animal, or object. When your cat rubs onto someone or something, they are marking using pheromones, especially those from their cheeks that mark the area as their home territory or as a part of their social group. The transfer of pheromones creates a group scent or ‘colony odour’. When your cat rubs up against you, they are stating you are their family, their social group.

Allogrooming

Allogrooming: when a cat grooms you, another cat or bonded animal

In this image, the one cat is pinning the other cat as they are grooming them. Their ears are back and body is stiff, so it is likely that they are allogrooming to reduce tension/aggression from the other cat

Cats allogrooming other cats often do so in the head and neck area, which are often areas that the cat being groomed cannot reach. When the cat being groomed leans in and enjoys it, that is when allogrooming is highly cooperative. However, if the cat allogrooming the other cat is pinning the cat down as they groom them, this behaviour is being exhibited to diffuse tension/reduce aggression or conflict.

Allogrooming behaviours often occur between cats who have strong social group bonds such as grew up together or lived together for years (happily!), or are related. It is a form of tactile communication that increases their strong bonds. So, if your cat grooms you, it is akin to allogrooming of cats.

In this photo, the groomed cat is leaning in, indicating that the allogrooming is cooperative

Bunting

Bunting: when a cat headbutts you, another cat, animal, or an object with their forehead

There is a small but distinct difference between bunting and allorubbing. Bunting is when your cat uses their forehead while allorubbing is when your cat uses their mouth, cheeks, tail, or body to rub against a person, another cat, animal, or object.

When your cat bunts you, similarly to allorubbing, they are doing this to deposit pheromones and create a group scent or to mark their territory. It can also be for reassurance, comfort, or for friendly social interaction. If your cat bunts you with their head, that is their way of asking for a pet, wants comfort from you, or is saying that you’re their family/social group.

Cats use the tactile communication social behaviours mentioned above to create an exchange of scent marking and to say that you’re a part of their social group/family. Which is pretty special.

If your cat has any behaviour or training problems, contact WFA here to learn about our in-person (Calgary only), or virtual courses to help you and your cat. Or learn more about them here